So, trying to keep our spirits up about having already spent $10 on babysitting while we drove around, we ended up back in our stomping grounds on Taylor Street at a Starbucks, (I forgot to preface this whole thing with the fact that Matt made homemade pizza for the kids last night and we couldn't resist eatting it too which is why we weren't going to a restaurant for dinner). We split a "salted caramel hot chocolate" (pretty good, but the milk killed my stomach since I'm a tad on the lactose intolerant side).
And we talked about Safe Homes which is a ministry through Lydia Home where you take in children for short periods of times while their families work through problems. It's a program that the churches in Chicago are really pushing these days because it would be nice if the church looked after the children who need homes and safety, after all. But we couldn't figure out how it would work with the kids we have. Sam is so demanding and Claire gets shafted all the time anyway. Would she just disappear if we had more kids who needed lots of attention in our home? Wouldn't it be better to adopt a child who needed a home permanently so that they could really be a member of our family rather than kids coming in and out of our home so often? I know that the latter would technically help more kids, but would our kids be upset to see kids coming and going out of their lives like that? We decided they would and that we'd have to revisit it after our kids are a lot older.
Sometimes this kind of night makes me think that dates are not worth it…that it’s too much trouble or too much to worry about. But that’s not true. Because somehow I can’t think at home. At least not about anything besides immediate needs. I would just keep cleaning stuff or organizing the house or thinking about stuff that needed to be done. I would feel overwhelmed by the frustrations of the day and instead of having a fun conversation with Matt, I’d just complain about how hard things are.
But somehow, when I came home with lipstick on and a Starbucks in my hand, the bathroom mess didn’t seem so devastating. I handled it with a level head and without crying about the disaster. So in the words of Sue Funk, whose children I used to babysit: “Go on dates. Even if you can’t afford it. Go on dates. Dress up. Shave your legs. Drink wine. And go. It’s cheaper than marriage counseling! It’s cheaper than a divorce! So just go. Even if you don’t go, you’ll still be just about as poor, so you may as well go.” Oh Sue. You are so wise. I’ll have to share more Sue-isms with you someday.